For the longest time I believed that my dream to become either a director or a screen-writer was just that, a distant dream, something never to be realised. I also believed that people who went forward in life saying they were going to 'do what they love' were idiots. I was going to do whatever got me paid the most. When it came to deciding what I was going to study in university, I asked myself - am I going to be the next Tim Burton or Hayao Miyazaki? Probably not. 
Do I have half the talent Sofia Coppola has? Not really, not at all.

At the time, it seemed wiser for me to follow in my family's footsteps and dive into the world of hard business and property management so I left home, went to London and last September, I began a degree in International Business. It only took a few months for me to realise that it wasn't for me. I didn't just not like it, I couldn't understand anything either (I struggle with basic maths). After deciding to leave, I asked myself, so what now? I can't tell you how many sleepless nights I had or how often I fought with those trying to help me but after some soul-searching, I came to the simple conclusion... I should just do what I love. 

I felt nervous about telling others that what I really love to do is simply create. However, as I've been obsessed with photography and writing my own stories for years, no one was really surprised. Infact, everyone I told encouraged me, saying a creative job would suit who I was and why hadn't anyone realised it sooner? Strangely, my parents apologised for holding me back when in reality, I had been the one holding myself back. I was afraid to even talk about what I really wanted, what I really dreamed of doing. I was just floating through life, without any real focus. I don't know why. The thought of me achieving something so grand, so cool seemed impossible but now, even though I haven't quite started on the road to success yet, I couldn't be more excited to get started, and finally make all my own dreams come true. 

2 comments:

HopeCove said...

Very happy for you! How exciting :) x

Unknown said...

so happy for you sara :)